MOUNT VERNON — Nichole Schmidt, mother of Gabby Petito, believes education about domestic violence can save lives.
Schmidt spoke at a Wednesday event hosted by New Directions, which provides free, confidential services to those experiencing domestic violence in Knox County.
“If anyone had told me a little over 5 years ago that I would be standing in front of a room full of people talking about domestic violence prevention, I would never have believed it,” she said.
“I don’t enjoy doing this. I just feel compelled to.”
Schmidt described herself as a mom living a normal life raising her kids.
“I never imagined that one day I will be standing in front of all of you here teaching the very things that I was never taught. The things my children were never taught, and the things our society still struggles to recognize,” she said.
“The warning signs, the patterns of control, the realities of domestic violence that so many of us simply don’t understand. Until it’s too late.”
Schmidt said Gabby was more than a missing person flyer, statistic, headline or documentary. She was a silly, creative, talented, kind and tough 22-year-old pursuing dreams.
“When people hear about someone who experiences domestic violence, they sometimes imagine a person who is weak, helpless, or incapable of standing up for themselves. That was not Gabby. Gabby was strong,” she said.
Petito, 22, died in 2021 during a cross-country van trip with her fiancé, Brian Laundrie. Authorities determined Laundrie killed her.
From the outside, it looked like an exciting adventure: A young couple exploring beautiful places and sharing pieces of their journey online, Schmidt said.
“Like many people, we saw what was visible to us. … What we didn’t see was the full picture.”
Knowing the warning signs of abuse
Schmidt now serves as president of the Gabby Petito Foundation, which trains communities and professionals to recognize abuse.
Schmidt said her family missed the signs. Petito endured love bombing, isolation, manipulation, intimidation and financial control, she said.
“We didn’t know what domestic violence really looked like either,” Schmidt said.
She learned the details only after reading her daughter’s text messages and journal entries, she said.
“As a parent, that’s incredibly painful. But I also know that we cannot go back and change what we didn’t know. What we can do is learn from it,” she said.
Schmidt described an Aug. 12, 2021, traffic stop in Moab, Utah. A witness reported seeing Laundrie slap Petito.
Officers stopped the van but did not recognize the larger pattern of control, Schmidt said.
She said that day represents incredible pain because it was the moment someone had the opportunity to intervene and look beyond the immediate incident, ask questions and recognize the situation might be more dangerous than it appeared.
“Gabby was failed that day,” she said. “The response did not adequately recognize the broader dynamics of abuse and control.”
Schmidt said she was not blaming all law enforcement. She called for consistent training on abuse dynamics and trauma.
“Sometimes that knowledge and understanding can be the difference between a life lost and a life saved,” she said.
She urged listeners to support survivors without judgment. She asked them to stop questioning why victims stay. Leaving can be dangerous, she said, and finances, children and housing complicate the choice.
“We need to put the blame where it belongs, back on the abusers,” Schmidt said.
Not just a national problem
New Directions Executive Director Lindsey Lamp said the shelter’s staff sees every day that domestic violence is not something that happens somewhere else or to someone else. Instead, it happens right here in the community.
The agency served 425 people in fiscal year 2026 and provided 2,886 free services.
“Those numbers represent real people, real experiences, and thousands of moments when someone reached out for safety, support, healing, or just hope,” Lamp said. “And behind every number, there’s a story that deserves to be heard.”
Schmidt praised local efforts from law enforcement and New Directions. She cited an April 2025 Knox Pages report that showed more felony domestic violence and strangulation cases in 2024.
“This isn’t about expecting someone to know everything. It’s about giving first responders the preparation and support they need to do an already difficult job as safely and effectively as possible.”
nichole schmidt
Schmidt credits increased reporting and awareness through the county’s use of the Lethality Assessment Program, a series of questions officers use to determine the risk level in an incident.
“They also recognize strangulation here as a felony rather than treating it as a lesser offense,” she said. “That reinforces the seriousness of this dangerous act. … Strangulation is a significant warning sign for future lethal violence.”
Schmidt closed by saying her family chose to act after Petito’s death.
“We cannot change what happened to Gabby,” she said. “But we can use her story to help change what happens next.”
‘Change the story’
Wednesday’s event marked Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Its theme was “Change the Story.”
“We chose this theme because we believe that changing the story begins with awareness, grows through conversations, and becomes meaningful throughout action,” Lamp said.
“The truth is, abuse doesn’t have one face. It can happen in any neighborhood, at any income level and in relationships that look perfectly happy from the outside. It can happen to people who are strong, confident, independent, and deeply loved by their family and friends. It can also happen to young people who are still learning what love is supposed to be like.”
nichole schmidt
The program also included a community panel, audience questions, a survivor story and a raffle. Attendees then walked from The Woodward Opera House to Riverview Park on South Gay Street for a vigil.
People seeking help can reach New Directions, Knox County’s domestic violence shelter, at 740-397-4357, the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or by texting START to 88788.
