MOUNT VERNON — Christmas is a magical time, full of excitement, holiday cheer, and, yes, a little bit of stress as we scurry to wrap presents and finish the holiday baking.
Tonight will be the busiest night of the year in many homes, including the House of Kringle.
Have you ever wondered how Santa Claus manages to wrangle the reindeer and deliver presents all over the world while maintaining his jolly ho ho ho?
Or what reindeer eat? Or whether he’s ever gotten stuck in a chimney?
There’s almost no end to the questions that children — and adults — have.
We had a chance to ask these questions and others when Santa stopped by The Grand Hotel in Mount Vernon last week.
Here’s an inside peek at how the Big Man gets things done and his life at the North Pole.
How do reindeer fly?
About a week before Christmas, we start giving them magic dust and magic pellets, which help them get ready to fly. But the only time they can really fly is on Christmas Eve.
We practice a few flights before we actually take off, but then the magic pellets do their job, and the reindeer can lift off.
Can I come to the North Pole?
Technically, yes. The North Pole is a part of the world, but you would never see my workshop because it is invisible to the human eye. It’s not really underground, but it is invisible.
It has a magic dome that protects us and keeps our environment steady, so we can do what we need without being detected.
Do you have penguins at the North Pole?
Yes, I love penguins. I think they’re cute. I love their lifestyle. But they’re not indigenous to the North Pole, so I had my elves build a special environment for them so they would be safe and still be near me. I can see them every day if I want to.
The environment the elves built for them is absolutely what they would find at the South Pole, where they normally live. So, that works out just fine.
What kind of cookies do you like?
Well, my favorite answer to that is: Round! My favorite cookie is a chocolate chip, but trust me, if you leave cookies out for Santa on Christmas Eve, they’ll get eaten.
Whatever people leave out for me, I’m more than happy to consume.
How do you deliver toys to all the children in one night?
Without getting too technical, I slow time down. If I can slow time down and an hour is a minute, then I have 60 hours in 1 minute. When we slow time down, we get a lot more done.
The other thing you have to keep in mind is that not everyone celebrates Christmas. So I don’t visit everyone in the world on Christmas Eve.
It’s not that we exclude anyone, but some people don’t necessarily want us to bring toys and other things to them.
Which is your favorite reindeer?
Oh, that’s really an easy question. I don’t have one. It’s sort of like parents with children: All my reindeer are different.
They mean something different to me, but I love them all the same.
What if we don’t have a fireplace and a chimney?
I have a special key. It has a reindeer on it, and it says 25, because Christmas is on the 25th of December. On the 24th of December, this key will open any door in the world that does not have a chimney or a fireplace, so I can get in.
The other thing is, I have an elf who goes with me, and sometimes that elf helps me get into homes with small openings. It’s sort of like an octopus. An octopus can go anywhere.
On Christmas Eve, Santa can pretty much go anywhere.
Do the reindeer like carrots?
This is a myth, and I think it’s important that people understand that my reindeer are basically caribou. They’re a wild reindeer that we’ve tamed and domesticated.
They don’t have any upper front teeth. They can eat carrots in a pinch, but they prefer not to. They have trouble chewing them.
Consequently, they have trouble digesting them, so we must give them something that gives them a lot of energy, which would be oats and raisins.
Who is your favorite elf?
All my elves are the same. I have millions of elves because there are millions of children. And the elves all have different jobs. Some make toys, some make cookies, some keep the reindeer healthy, but all my elves are the same to me.
I love them all the same. Some I see a lot more than others, but they’re all the same in Santa’s eyes.
What does Santa want for Christmas?
What I get for Christmas is pleasing other people, making them happy, and doing my best to give joy and peace to the world. That would be my wish for Christmas.
I would like to see people get along and everyone stay on the nice list.
Can you bring my Grandpa back? He died this year, and I really miss him
My answer to that is that Santa specializes in toy-making, traveling the world in one night, taking care of elves, and taking care of reindeer. Santa can’t bring someone back who’s passed away.
What I told this child was that when his grandpa is looking down on him, he’s proud of him, and to look at it this way: He’s probably spending Jesus’ birthday with him.
While Santa can’t bring someone back who’s passed away, it’s important that we keep their memory alive. That’s what Santa tries to do: keep people’s memories alive.
Do you ever get tired of eating all the cookies and milk people leave out for you?
Tired probably isn’t the right word, but full might be. To be honest, a lot of times I’ll take some of them with me back to the North Pole for the elves and Mrs. Claus.
Also, I don’t normally eat the whole cookie. I’ll take two or three bites, and then I’ll take the rest of it with me.
Those are the kinds of things we try to keep in check as we travel around the world.
We are at Grandma and Grandpa’s house for Christmas. How will you find us?
Hundreds of years ago, that question was much more difficult to answer than it is now, thanks to GPS and other global positioning systems. It’s very easy to keep track.
Many times, parents will let us know, but trust me, we never miss a stop. We never miss a child, and we make sure all the presents get delivered.
Who delivers presents if you get sick?
Well, fortunately, I’ve not had to worry about that yet. But you never know. Someone asked if Mrs. Claus did it, but no. I have specially trained elves that can drive the sleigh. They can deliver gifts, and as long as I can keep an eye on the videos, I can help direct them where they need to go.
But don’t worry, Santa tries to stay healthy. We have good, healthy food and good, healthy air at the North Pole, but if something does happen, we’ve got it covered.
Am I on the nice list?
I’m going to give a little secret. This year, Santa decided that a nice-and-naughty list is not something I really want to do. So I have a nice list — because we do have some children that are just nice all the time, pretty much, and that makes us feel good — and an “I’m trying harder” Santa list.
We all make mistakes. We all have situations where we might say or do the wrong thing, but Santa looks at intent. So there’s not really a naughty list.
Where’s Rudolph? Where’s your sleigh?
My sleigh and the reindeer are at the North Pole. It takes almost a year to get the sleigh ready for the trip on Christmas Eve because it’s a long trip, and it takes a beating. The reindeer take a long time to recover.
And did you know that Rudolph is 86 years old? That seems old when you think about it, but that’s very young compared with the other reindeer.
Have you ever gotten stuck in a chimney?
Well, I have been stuck in a chimney a couple of times. Thank goodness I’m not claustrophobic. I carry WD-40 with me just in case, but Mrs. Claus actually worried about that, too. She came up with a recipe of butter and other things.
And an elf rides with me in the sleigh on Christmas Eve, so he can come to my rescue if I get stuck in a chimney. It doesn’t happen much anymore, but when I was learning to slide down chimneys, it did happen on occasion.
Can I have a puppy?
You have to keep in mind that my reindeer are magic, so they can handle the altitude and the speed of the sleigh, not to mention how cold it is. Regular animals can’t.
So Santa brings stuffed animals. And then he tells parents or other adults that you would like a puppy or a kitten and asks if they would consider getting one for you.
What is Mrs. Claus’ first name?
Mrs. Claus likes to keep a low profile. What I can tell you is that the elves call her Mama Claus. That’s what she goes by at the North Pole, and that’s where she spends most of her time.
How old are you?
I was born almost 2,000 years ago in a place called Myra, which today is in Turkey, Asia Minor. It’s a long way from here.
My parents were in shipping, and they made a lot of money. They allowed me to have that money, and that’s how I got into being Santa Claus.
I started buying gifts and things like that for folks. I enjoyed it so much that I use that money now to be Santa Claus. And now, of course, the elves do it, too.
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